3 Men and a Little Lady Install a Kitchen Faucet wSoap Dispenser (No Words, Just Photos)

:)

Words of Wisdom

Don't focus on what you don't have, focus on what you do.

Amended 8.18.08 after watching Micheal Phelps, previously disgnosed with ADHD and as a "hyper kid" set Olympic history with 8 gold medals -

More to the point, I think, is the moral of her story, which offers hope for parents of any child with a challenge like A.D.H.D.: Too many adults looked at Ms. Phelps’s boy and saw what he couldn’t do. This week, the world will be tuned to the Beijing Olympics to see what he can do

Not Child's Play...

• Recently we attended a play date with the parent's group a friend of mine
  started. I was really upset by the experience and hope that sharing gets me over and through it.
• I had advised the organizer of the group time and
  time again that Ashton can be a little wild and difficult to manage at times.
  She insisted that the group was full of alternative-style parents and that he
  would be accepted "as is" in all of his eccentricities. So, on a day when Paul
  was off from work, we decided to meet the group for the 1st time.
• The play date was at the home of my friend, A, the organizer. On the way to the
  group Ashton asked where we were going and who would be there. After explaining
  we were going to see A and her daughter, R, Ashton very happily exclaimed he
  would love to share some of his American flags with R and proudly held up which
  one he planned to give. Now, as a fanatic collector of items, I was impressed
  with his plan to give something he currently treasured away, especially to
  someone he had met only once.
• Once we arrived at the house, I was a little nervous but encouraged by Ashton's preplanned generosity and happy to be meeting so many new people. The age of the children that attended the playgroup that day ranged from 6 months - ~2 years old, excluding Ashton who's 3.5. I was a little surprised to see that while the kitchen was gated off, the rest of the house was not but did not get the impression that anywhere was off limits for the children, particularly the nursery. Ashton, brimming with the curiosity of a
  3 year old, raced around to check out everything he could, but staying out of
  the master bedroom and bath. (Ashton and Kate were the only children who left
  the living room area...why I don't know.) The toy he came back in to the living
  room with, having found it god knows where, was a cowbell.
• I am going to talk about the cow bell, not as the only instance where I felt the parents of
  the group were annoyed with Ashton, but as the one I remember most. Now, the cow
  bell WAS loud from the joy he got when he rang it, but I have to put my foot
  down and say, why have a toy for a child that no one wants them to play with. I
  say this only because, as he rang the bell, I heard several off hand remarks
  like "WOW, that's quite a bell" and "Maybe we should put some tissue around the
  inside so it doesn't make any noise." Now, what the heck kind of sense does that
  make to have a bell that doesn't make noise? I suppose I'm harking on this point
  because I don't understand what happened. I mean, a)he was invited to a group to
  play but not seemingly to play in the way he likes to play, which is typical for
  a 3 year old boy and b) had I taken the bell away from him, he would have been
  so upset a loud cow bell would have sounded like soft wind chimes in comparison
  with his protesting tantrum. I mean, what is the point of a "play group" if not
  to PLAY? What would have been the appropriate way for him to "play"? Sitting
  quietly on my lap? Bowing and curtsying? I saw one dad spending most of the time
  quietly reading a book to his daughter and holding her on his lap, but really,
  why come to a group to do that?
• Another thing, one mother quickly packed her little girl up the moment she began to throw a tantrum and whisked her out the door. I wonder if I should do the same and feel shamed into quickly leaving if my children were to act up? Or should I feel that in public, let
  alone around other parents, I should feel free to work through the tantrum,
  discipline, then get back to the group? Why try to hide something that everyone
  else surely goes through?
• But hey, maybe this just wasn't the group I thought it was or we are not group people. I observed another mother, not finding joy in her 16-month old's identification of a penguin toy as a "duck", but scolding her 16 MONTH OLD for not using the word penguin instead. I mean, WOW, the genus of a species...from a 16-month old. Wow, that's not expecting a
  lot or anything...:(
• Maybe in all the rush to organize and categorize and perfect our children, this generation is causing them to miss out on so much. Like the email the co-organizer of the group sent out for the next playgroup. Maybe my bad experience was due to age difference, as the email
  specified this one would be for kids "2 and under due to the age appropriateness
  of the toys". (This was by the father who was quietly reading to his child
  during the playgroup, so maybe he's unfamiliar with the term "parallel playing".
  Or maybe he's just unfamiliar with toys and kids, the fact that if they belong
  to someone else they are always "age appropriate".) But really, what is the harm
  in older kids mixing with younger kids? Isn't that how younger kids learn? From
  older kids? Or does he fear my child's sensory integration dysfunction will rub
  off on his? What better to teach our children than tolerance for differences? I
  would never intentionally exclude a child for any reason and cannot understand
  anyone that would.
• I fear the age limit was set due to fear of Ashton's high-energy. This now seems to exclude Ashton from most activities, as I cannot find a parent with a child his age that is not working during the times we have free. I fear that he is now excluded from the core of the group who's one member stated "A great support structure for parents with kids to reassure them they are not alone." Ironically I now feel very alone and more isolated than ever, particularly since I still have not had any communication to see how we liked
  our first visit to the group from the organizer, my friend, A, who hosted the
  event in her home. A's husband joined the play date late, but seemed overly polite, preoccupied
  with apologizing for his baby's moodiness (aren't all babies moody?) and expressed surprised the toys were
  taken out (by my kids of course). So hey, maybe we left an equally bad impression?
  I really don't know. Maybe I am being overly-sensitive, but when it comes to
  one's children, who isn't?
• I will say this, by excluding Ashton, even from one play date, they are excluding a child who is full of joy and energy with communication skills that are phenomenal enough to help his best friend, Richard, learn English better than his parent's native Spanish. They are also
  excluding Kate, who cannot attend playgroups without Ashton, but who cares more
  for babies than any adult or toy. I may be over reacting, but I had such high hopes that were quickly deflated.
• I've since canceled my membership to the group and will stick to more informal play times where anything goes and imaginations as well as cow bells can ring free.

A Proud Auntie

It was reported to me today that Angelique is potty-trained! The first of the grandchildren to do so! I am VERY proud of her accomplishment and can't wait to share the news with Ashton & Kate when they awake. Kate is beginning to become VERY interested in this magical seat called "the potty" and Ashton, well, he can some days but most he can't.

Dominique told me the motivation was Princess Panties from Wal-Mart...no potty, no panties. Angelique, being the genius child she is, quickly caught on and hasn't turned back since.

Great job Angelique!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Mamaspeakin'

The day I realized I was going to be a mother, I never dreamed things like the following would flow daily from my mouth like raindrops in a thunderstorm.

"Young Lady, we do NOT use peanut butter and jelly sandwiches to wipe
our bellies with."

Even more distant in my realization of what motherhood is really about...this was not the strangest part of my day today.

I Touched a Zebra Today...

Today, in honor of America's birthday, we left the country! Well...not REALLY! But it did feel as if we stepped off a puddle jumper onto a safari through the Serengeti. We then had to "return" as the monsoon season began.

You see, up in Mooresville, NC there is a privately owned ranch that is home to an amazing variety of exotic animals. As you slowly drive your own car through 3.5 miles of trail, you pass Ostriches as tall as your car, deer that come right up to your window looking for kibbles and come eye to eye with Emus that stare you into submission! The whole experience was amazing, just under an hour from our home.

Kate thoroughly enjoyed the giant "ducks" as she called them, sending out a wild laugh each time they would come to the window. Ashton was fascinated by the dark black and white pigs that seemed to roam everywhere, asking again and again if they were coming to his room (see earlier post ~Pigs & Poultry). Paul enjoyed the camels and rhinoceros the most and I, well, I was simply amazed by the sheer size of the Zebras. For some reason I thought they were more pony-sized than Clydesdale-sized!

I was suprised that Paul allowed me to unbuckle the children from their car seats, but almost fell on the floor when he agreed to let them take turns sitting on his lap and "driving". At one point Ashton even had full control of the steering wheel when Paul lifted his hands up to give him a chance. I really enjoyed witnessing these father/son and father/daughter moments.

As it was hot and VERY sticky outside, we ended up not staying as long as we would have liked at the petting area/pirate ship playground/porch swings. The rumble of distant thunder quickly approaching drove us into our car and back towards Charlotte. Just as we got on 85S, the heavens opened up and down came the rain. Normally I'm not scared of some water on my windshield, but the more cars we passed that had pulled over due to the downpour, the more nervous I became. We soon passed a car in a ditch facing the wrong way then witnessed another car fly off the road going about 80 MPH and into the middle median. The children also didn't like the loud roaring of the rain on our van and soon became scared.

To comfort Kate after seeing a very frightened look not leaving her face, I reached back to hold hold her hand, even though I was expecting her to jerk it away as she always does. But this time, she held my hand the whole way home, even asking to hold Daddy's hand as well. I will admit that, however selfish it may seem, I am glad she was scared and really enjoyed comforting her and the feeling of her still tiny hand curled around my first two fingers.

I really had a wonderful time and can't wait to take the kids and hope to take Angelique again soon.

Check out all the photos from my cell phone (camera battery had died) here - http://www.the704reids.shutterfly.com/

In Case You Call...

Hate to tell you, but this is likely if you call...

Little Miss & Mr. Liberty

Today our neighborhood hosted an early 4th of July celebration, complete with parade and festival! Getting up early, Kate and I took careful pride in decorating the ol' Radio Flyer with anything and everything RED, WHITE, and BLUE we owned. Feeling very satisfied with our results, we then dressed in our most Patriotic of outfits and drove down to the pool area where we thought the parade was to begin. After practicing our march around the pool area, where Kate pulled Ashton in our float for everyone to see, we were informed the parade actually ENDED at the pool and we'd better hurry down to the other side of the neighborhood where it was starting! So, after hastily scooping up a toddler in each arm, we drove to where the parade was in progress, pulled over to the side of the road, unloaded each little one and ended up bringing up the rear of the parade. Ashton was so excited to be in the "Horrary-de" as he called it, and marched with knees high right in front of the police car that had lights flashing. While the 90*+ weather began to wear first Ashton down, then Kate, they both ended up riding in the wagon with the previous only passenger - Baby Doll. I sweated it out pulling everyone up the gia-normous hill and coasted to the pool house. We each chose a hot dog from the vendor and Ashton helped himself to a red iced cupcake and made sure to bring Kate a blue one. With both children a mess from the icing, we hurried over to the bathrooms to wash up. Just as we were coming out of the bathrooms we were just in time to hear "Ashton & Kate Reid, winners of the parade float contest!" I was so proud of them as everyone told us how great we looked and how cute the float was. And to think, I almost didn't go since Paul was working and I rarely take the two into public alone! I am so excited that Ashton's therapy is helping with this and, while the dj was playing the music loud and it made Ashton a bit overexcited, all-in-all it was a great time!

Gavin Photo Show

Be Sure to Turn Sound On!

Currently Reading/Watching/Doing

I think this is the least I can do between times when the writing bug hits:

• Currently Reading:
• Growing a Girl: Seven Strategies for Raising a Strong, Spirited Daughter by Dr. Barbara Mackoff (excellent!)
• Taming the Spirited Child: Strategies for Parenting Challenging Children Without Breaking Their Spirits by Michael Popkin, Ph.D. (recommended by Ashton's old Occupational Therapist who we loved)
• From Difficult to Delightful in Just 30 Days: How to Improve the Behavior of Your Spirited Child by Jacob Azerrad, Ph.D
• The EVERYTHING Parent's Guide to the Strong-Willed Child: An authoritative guide to raising a respectful, cooperative and positivve child by Carl E. Pickhardt, Ph.D
  Currently Watching:
• The Painted Veil (Naomi Watts & Edward Norton) - 2007. Just got it from the library, looking forward to checking it out. {No pun intended}
• Flipping Out (Bravo) - The 2nd season just started and I LOVE this show!!!
• So You Think You Can Dance - Kate and Ashton love watching this too!
• The Courtship of Eddie's Father (Ron Howard) - 1963. I can't stop wondering if people really dressed as formally as this move portrays they did back then. I mean, really, kids wore ties to SCHOOL?????!!???
  Currently Doing:
• Gardening - when we first moved in to our house, we had 4 bushes and a Bradford Pear tree. We've since added a monster deck, a Japanese Weeping Cherry, a bed running the entire side of our house that now wraps around to the deck (the 1st set of bushes and plants were scorched and died by the past drought so we replanted with better weather and knowledge in Sept of last year and it's doing MUCH better), flowers and a Japanese maple to the front bed, a bed around the mailbox, a bed around the old tree, not to be confused with the Ol' G, and herbs to the back bed. GO US!
• Parenting - Working on Ashton's listening and following directions and Kate's new found defiance. Also, still no potty training success with Ashton. And really trying to be "in the moment" with the little ones so that I can just enjoy them and not always focus on what's not going well. THIS IS REALLY HARD LATELY.
• Hanging Out - threw a party for Paul's birthday and had "grown up time". I discovered I really miss my old friends and that I've been seculed and feel kinda lonely. So... my old best friend Angi and I have GREAT plans to get together Monday nights for wine and catch up. Wish me luck with implementing and sticking to it!
  

I Know, I Know...

I know, I know... I have not been the best with my posts and writing as often as anyone would like, so apologies are in order! We actually have been busy with the following projects-

1. Cleaning and re staining our deck
2. Landscaping and finishing touches on yard
3. Visiting mom two weekends in a row (This past weekend was Angelique's 2nd birthday party!)
4. Paul's brother Ron was in town for a week
5. Getting ready for our yard sale this weekend
plus our camera was temporarily lost (but now is found)

Also, FYI mom is having her gallbladder removed this week, so if the postings don't come this week, they will be there next. Love you mom and hope you feel better soon!
And Dar, looking forward to seeing photos of your cross-country trip soon!

The Time Will Be Here Before We All Know It...

This list comes from Karen, but I agree with ALL OF IT. So, when the time comes for my little ones, I hope this still holds tried and true about the years post-high school with parents and pre-adulthood.
So you’re off to college? Things you should know…
-Go away to college! IF YOU STAY AT HOME AND COMMUTE, THAT'S JUST HIGH SCHOOL PART II!! (This is from Dawn).
- There is nothing worse than the first time you get sick and Mom isn’t there to take care of you. Driving to Wal-Mart to get your own Pepto Bismal and chicken soup is horrible and will make you feel very lonely and totally pathetic. To make this bad situation bearable, have “sick” supplies on hand (better yet, stock a medicine cabinet to take with you) before you get sick.
- You know you are a grown up when you have to spend your own money to buy toothpaste and toilet paper.
- You will hate doing laundry. In fact, you will go buy more underwear rather than washing your dirty ones.
-Good luck with roommates.
- The people you make friends with in college will probably still be your friends in ten years. You may never speak to the people from your high school again.
- Have mercy—call home.
- Tell your parents, grandparents, friends, and significant others to send you stuff in the mail. Empty mail boxes are depressing. Furthermore, have them send you “exam supplies” (with lots of sugar) during exam time.
- Stay on top of your academic adviser. They make mistakes that can delay your graduation!
- There is a limbo-zone in which you exist between graduating from high school and before you actually start college (or whatever you will be doing) when you feel like you no longer belong at home, but you don’t belong to this new phase in your life either. There is nothing to be done about this.
- There are idiots in your dorm who will pull the fire alarm at 3 AM. Keep a pillow and a blanket in your car (if it’s close) so you can stay warm and go back to sleep.
- Learn to write thank-you notes.
- Keep change on hand for vending machines and coin laundry.
- Take a multivitamin and drink A LOT of water.
- Everyone gets sick at exam time.
- Take advantage of the groups on campus but don't let them dominate and define you—Bible study, Young Democrats, sports teams, frats/sororities, RAs, etc. Be involved or you will get very little out of this experience.
- Live on campus for at least the first year.
- Learn to cook in a microwave and have a mini-fridge!
- If you’ve never had to study before, you are going to learn now.
- I would advise against a credit card.
- Have something you need to take care of—like a plant.
- You are going to make mistakes—some insignificant and some enormous—this is normal and it happens to everyone. Be the kind of person who learns from your mistakes.
- Every now and then, skip class to have an iced tea and sit in the sun with a friend.
- 8 AM classes will be the end of your academic career.
- The time that you are in college will be the point in your life when you are the most open-minded. Try not to forget what that is like after you graduate.
- Major in something you love—not something simply that may eventually make you a lot of money.
- Be safe, drive carefully, and wear your seatbelt.
- Go on big trips over summer break. Take LOTS of pictures.
- Sometimes life is going to throw you curve balls. You can't really practice for this, but the way you react to what happens will speak volumes about the kind of person you are.
- Try to conduct yourself in a way that you will not find embarrassing in the future.
- You absolutely never know what is going to happen to you so never say never, have a plan B and C, and remember that sometimes, when the door isn't open, you may have to go through the window.
- Keep a flashlight and an umbrella in your car.
- Remember that every person in your life is there for a reason. The right people always show up exactly when you need them and they stay just as long as you need them to stay. Be sure you make the most of the time you are given.
- Don't forget that "you are really fine" and "all is well in the universe."
- And, as Garrison Keillor says, “Be well, do good work, and keep in touch.”

What Happens When Mommy Has a Tough Week?

I tell you what happens when a Mommy has a tough week...EVERYONE has a tough week. What's the old saying "If Momma ain't happy, ain't nobody happy"? Yes, chalk that one up to fact vs. fiction.

Mol an óige agus tiocfaidh sí. {Gaelic}

"Praise the young and they shall blossom."

An Irish Blessing For A Baptism Day

May God grant you always

A sunbeam to warm you

A moonbeam to charm you

A sheltering angel so nothing can harm you

Laughter to cheer you

Faithful friends near you

And whenever you pray

Heaven to hear you.

Gavin Marc Rossmeisl was baptised at St. John Neuman Catholic Church and behaved like a perfect angel. The ceremony was beautiful and the party following was filled with wonderful food and good times.

In the spirit of the 95*F heat outside, everyone came warmly together to show their love and faith for Gavin as his sins were washed clean and he could begin his lifelong spiritual journey surrounded by those who love him.

Click Here for a more photos: http://the704reids.shutterfly.com/action/pictures?a=67b0de21b3477d0684b7